No-Exist

Religion is spiritual nationalism. It's not time to co-exist, it's time to stop the aimless speculation and metaphysical dice rolling and admit that WE DON'T KNOW what's going to happen when the final light goes out. SO, commit to the common denominator of humanity and put your efforts towards the things that bind us all. Like, air. Water. Food. Once we get that straight we can all go back to our storytelling.

All That Remains

when you left
you forgot
your toothpaste

one last squeeze
and you're
gone

No Ice

we keep forgetting to make ice
(it’s been years now)
the cricket behind the fridge
is actually ten crickets behind the fridge
The white plaster spot,
that I fixed
where I punched
still isn’t painted
and now
actually seems
part of
the kitchen
And the hum of the computer fan
can’t even drown out its own futility
and she sleeps
unaware of all its all-ness
and all its nothingness
sleeps
and perhaps
dreams

Dada Da

I just became a surreal estate agent. I'm now licensed to sell floating eyes, melting clocks and stairs that go nowhere.

Senor Pinchy Eyes

George Bush was never running this country. He had more hands up his ass than a season of “The Muppets”.

Old Is The New New

“Sears to Reorganize Into Separate Operating Units”

The units are to be known as “Local Hardware Stores” and will be run by highly knowledgeable, though extremely slow and cranky employees.

Sit & Think

I was thinking about getting into meditation. I wasn’t thinking about it too hard of course.. because.. then.. I would have been meditating about getting into meditation and I’m pretty sure that would cause some sort of rip in the time/space continuum.